I find that interviewers very often focus on the hard skills, but I think it’s the soft skills that can make/break a candidate. So my question is- how do you recommend working in my soft skills and their importance in the job interview when not directly asked? I usually try to highlight within the context of my “STAR” stories.

Bring your behaviours into your answers. The relationships you've built, the challenging people you've persuaded etc. It's important to be clear on the activity and the task, but ensure, within the STAR framework, you're not only answering the "what" you did but the "how" you did it. 

As an interviewer the "how" means more to me, as it's a signal not only to your ability to succeed in the role but your ability to be the best you can be within the culture of the organisation. 

I am a huge fan of the STAR format (and also keeping answers to two minutes or less)! For any interview, I think it's important to identify and prepare your key 3-4 examples, which you can then use to display a wide range of skills depending on the question type. When you're responding to a question using one of these examples, make sure to take the opportunity to quickly highlight some of those soft skills.

Example: If you're asked about a time where you had to analyze data, of course you should convey how you analyzed the data, but you likely had to work with someone from analytics to identify the right data set, perhaps you got a second opinion from a different team that differed from yours which you had to reconcile, and then you had drive cross-functional alignment when you created recommendations based on that data.

If you are an experienced product marketer, you should naturally have lots of examples that can display your soft skills. For candidates in other functions that want to transition into product marketing, make sure to identify examples where you've partnered with other teams or engaged with customers that will give you the opportunity to let your soft skills shine through.

I'd weave these topics in as you answer the hard skill questions. Depending on your examples, theu could be easier to be included. Things to touch upon:

1. Leadership + Influencing without authority 

2. Collaboration with XFN teams

3. Dealing with ambiguity (in particular in startup/smaller companies)

4. Managing conflict 

5. Inclusiveness (this is something I look for frequently but hardly ever touched upon by candidates)

6. Communicating across stakeholders

However, please note that a good interview process should cover both hard and soft skills. If no one in your interview panel is asking you the soft skills questions, I'd do a deep dive to see if this is a red flag - you want to work for a company that cares about these areas and that pushes their employees to develop them as well. Both the WHAT and the HOW are equally important.

I agree that soft skills are key, and highlighting them during “STAR” stories is a great way to work them into your interview. You can also share them when expressing your interest in the role and/or asking about the role. Most job descriptions include some mention of soft skills, so note that when discussing the role with your interviewer and how the role felt like a great fit for you because of that. Ask about which soft skills the interviewer is looking for, and highlight which ones are your strengths.

I love this question! I always look for the soft skills because smart, hardworking people will learn the hard skills.

When I'm hiring, I think about what the business and team needs in its current state through the next year or so. Sometimes that means I have the flexibility to hire someone who doesn't have all the hard skills (and can learn them) but sometimes it means I need someone who knows the job inside and out and can hit the ground running without much coaching on the hard skills. I believe we as individuals are always developing and learning, so coaching is a critical part of development (soft and hard skills).

The best way to show off your soft skills, for me, is through the conversation we have. What are the questions you ask? What is your attitude and demeanor like? What examples do you share and how do you articulate them? When I'm evaluating candidates, the soft skills I'm looking for in a new teammate are:

• Work Ethic (Are they hardworking?)

• Intellectual Curiosity(Are they curious and hungry to learn?)

• Teamwork (Are they collaborative?) (

• Communication (Are they a good communicator / how do they communicate?)

• Decision Making (How will they react and/or handle different situations and scenarios?)

Lastly, references are a great way to validate your soft skills. Anyone you ask to be a reference for you, make sure you know how they will talk about your strengths and areas of opportunity. This person has worked with you before so their opinion impacts a hiring managers decision making. It's just one data point, but a good one I add to my list when making hiring decisions.

Even if you get a very specific product marketing question during an interview, I promise you that your soft skills are still being assessed at the same time. Are you a clear and confident communicator? Were you able to use influence and persuasion to get your work done? Did you take initiative to drive your own outcomes, or follow in the path others made for you? Communication, influence, and initiative are all soft skills that can make a break a product marketer.

Maybe think of the PMM questions as getting at 'what' you've achieved as a marketer and think of soft skills as all about the 'how.' Can't have one without the other so you should be able to respond to each question with a what and a how answer, and then you've checked both boxes.

If you think the interviewer isn’t asking you the right questions to dig into the softer skills, bring it up yourself. The way I would do it is by asking them the question of what soft skills, outside of XYZ, they care about for this hire. Or you can ask them what soft skills do some of their best PMMs have? What does it take to be successful at that company?

And then work in your experience and areas where you excel.

While interviewers focus on your response to the hard skills question, they are simultaneously evaluating your soft skills as well. Generally, they are evaluating your EQ and your communication skills, your ability to interpret questions and think critically in real time, and your ability to provide direct and concrete answers.

Here is an example that I hope really illustrates my point: if an interviewer asks “Tell me about yourself,” they are looking for a concise career narrative but also watching how the candidate will respond more generally. Is the answer succinct and can the candidate narrow the message on the most important points? Does the response highlight how it is applicable to the job the candidate is applying for? If it’s a 5-minute long (verbal diarrhea) response, it’s a red flag that the candidate is unable to focus on the important key messages. It also betrays a certain lack of self-awareness. So long rambling answers (which are surprisingly common) are concerning for multiple reasons.

To answer your question about how to work on your soft skills:

1. Be succinct in your answer. I can’t stress this enough. Answer the question that was asked directly, without long background or detail. (I recommend you research the concept of ‘core answers’)

2. For those who are shy: make eye contact and work on being confident in your answers. You do that by owning your answer and your career path and by not making apologies for yourself, such as gaps in your employment or not having the 100% right background. You chose your career path so don’t be afraid to take pride in it. Also, smile lots because that will help you be more relaxed.

3. For those who are really confident: Please don’t come across as arrogant. I’ve seen numerous really strong candidates sink their job opportunity because they came off as condescending (they were besserwissers, they talked over people, they didn’t listen to the questions that were being asked, they made strong and off-putting statements, etc.) They may have been perfect in every other way but no one wants to work with a jerk. EQ matters and if you are perceived as arrogant, you are communicating to everyone that you don’t have the right level of EQ.

4. Some interviewers try hard to throw a candidate off balance during the interview. They purposefully push and push and push to see how you react. Don’t let them rattle you – it’s a cheap trick designed to get under your skin.